Story: Traveling to Oakland

January 9, 2014

Now I have a conundrum of how to transport myself to Oakland from San Diego

Rent a car

I could rent a car for the week, unlimited mileage, for about $150. It would take about 7 hours to drive to Oakland. Good: Id have a car while in Oakland, I can listen to cds and NPR and audio books. Bad: boring to drive that far by myself, sitting all day, have to stop to eat, stretch my legs, buy gas.

Take Greyhound

Greyhound is $135 round trip from SD to Oakland. Good: I already have spent that money. All that time I would be able to rest, eat, read, listen to the radio, etc., someone else is driving. Bad: it takes 12 hours. I have to be at the bus terminal at 5:30 am to leave at 6. I would be around a lot of other people. Greyhound is notorious for not leaving on time, bathroom in the back of the bus and I might have to go pee a lot.  I would need to take a cab to the terminal, an additional cost of $50 which Moreen has offered to pay. Total expense  with cab: $235.

Plane

I could fly SW for $4oo round trip. Good: get there faster, be more relaxed, Moreen can take me down and pick me up, dan can pick me up in Oakland, done it before. Bad: expense. If I’d booked the flight months ago it would be about $140 round trip, as my trip was last March.

Hitchike

I haven’t hitch hiked since I was in college. In the 70’s it was pretty common, just stand on the sidewalk with your thumb pointing in the direction you want to go. I did a lot of this, or I seem to remember doing this, and having some good rides. Good: Free, meet different people Bad: meet bad people, get stuck at a freeway ramp all night, be killed by some kind of serial killer, hunting only for blonde, old guys, who wouldn’t mind a stiletto in their kidney after being pushed out of the moving car at 40 miles an hour, and he turns around, goes back to the last freeway entrance, and runs me over once, twice, three times. Never get to Oakland to see Alice. Lose the money I spent for a b and b in Oakland. Wouldn’t be able to make and drink coffee at Stewarts.

Hot air balloon

This would cost uku bucks unless it was a do it yourself job. Good: The wind would carry me to Oakland. Bad: The wind could take me into the middle of the pacific, get a hole in it and I would be stranded in shark infested waters. I would get wet. I would get cold. My cell phone would be wrecked so I couldn’t call 911 or whatever you dial for ocean emergencies. All my clothes would get wet, or my suitcase could float away.

Fly

I’ve dreamt many times of flying, so if I could run fast enough and flap my arms, I could get a good running start. Good: Free. Bad: I would have a tough time getting airborne with a suitcase, backpack, food, etc. Even without all those things I might have a tough time getting airborne. I would have to flap my arms really fast. I would be exhausted after half a block, much less getting to Oakland. I might run into birds, get caught in telephone wires, be mistaken for a bird, and being shot down. Then the hunter would take me home and eat me.

Swim

It’s straight up the coast from here to Oakland. Good: Free. Bad: (See hot air balloon bad above.) I would need to practice, a lot, before undertaking a 3 day swim, which is about what it would take me, give or take a few days. All I would have when I got there was my swimsuit, goggles, fins, so I’d have to do a lot of shopping, which would be probably $100. I could continue wearing the fins so I wouldn’t have to buy shoes. If the weather is warm enough I can wear my swimsuit. Since I wont have my reading glasses, Ill have to figure out a way to bend the goggle so it would work like my glasses.

Stay Home

This is the best bet all around. Good: I don’t have to go anywhere. I can sleep in my own bed. Misty wouldn’t be sad because I was gone. I wouldn’t have to pack. I would have a week of utter relaxation. Bad: I wouldn’t be able to see Alice, Rachel and Dan, or Rachel’s parents, or go to CAL game.

The options are endless! I’m sure you can think of other creative, inexpensive ways for me to go north. I haven’t even listed teleportation, just sending my spirit while I stay home, walking or running, using a canoe or a motorboat instead of swimming, setting myself on fire so it makes me run really, really fast, going by UPS with the words Extremely Fragile Because a Human is in this Box, covering myself in postage so that the mailman would transport me in his little mail truck (not a good idea. Where would I put my suitcase?), dying so that I don’t have to worry about going, or anything, for that matter, for eternity. I would see Alice, Rachel and Dan on the other side after I waited a few years for them to die, that is if we end up in the same place, or on the same floor, or in the same building, in heaven, of course, but there’s always the other option.